The last couple of days I was doing GREAT. No fatigue, headaches or much pain in my abdomen-thought I was back to normal despite the unpainful tightness in my stomach. However, I was barely active. Work today triggered it...10 times worse. I was determined to suck it up because I needed to get back. But once I sat down, the pain escalated to the point where I just started bawling. I got sent home and here I am with the prediction by my parents (dad is a doctor) that I may have a cyst on my ovary. It's a good guess because issues with this run in the family.

I don't get it. I don't get that after everything, the doctors never saw this as a potential reason for this pain. I am wondering if I had a cyst that it would have shown up on the results?

People tell me to rest this weekend. I can't. I have 2 exams Monday over the crap I missed from already being sick and yesterday was my first day back. There's no way I can catch up on this. My semester is completely out of wack now and I worked hard for the A I would have had in History. I think now I just need to accept the fact my grades won't be what they are expected to be..my dad understands that.

Yeah "more bad news"...but this could be a big break in all of this. Although it doesn't explain the nodes around my intestine that indicated a virus. Are 2 things happening at once that are totally separate from each other? They say bad things come in threes.


md.

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I have been catching up with my photography assignment that I have been behind on since I was sick. I have one more picture to take and it's 1:32 am. Bah. I got this though and I love photography THAT much.

The theme is Take objects and put them where they don't belong.

Click the pictures to see original:




Shoes in an oven.



6 years today. I miss you, Andrea. You are my sunshine and thanks for having an amazing sister.

xo md.

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Before I start, to the person who text me and said I was the bearer of bad news, screw you. Your pointless words could MAYBE have been justified if I was telling you something stupid like "boys are always douche bags" (extra emphasis on "boy") Am I being mean? Sorry, I am not going to let this NOT affect me anymore. I can't help what has been going on with me and what you said last night has allowed me to see you in the light that you really are as a person.

I had my follow-up today. Basically nothing new except that I see the Urologist tomorrow and an Endocrinologist in the near future. They think the infection around my colon and the air in my bladder is due to the past urinary tract infections I have been having (I have had about 6 this year and last) and so I really don't know what to expect. I am afraid they are going to put in a catheter at some point though...(positive thinking..............). The Endocrinologist will see if the lesions found in my thyroid are anything to be worried about. My dad doesn't think so because they are very small and it would be difficult to biopsy anyways. I am not too worried about those.

I am feeling better pain wise but still have a lot of fatigue when I become active. I plan to return to school Friday and work on Saturday. I am ready to get back to normal.

I have decided that I am going to take a step back. If you want updates, tell me..if not, I won't ever say a word. Friends don't really seem to give a damn unless you're dead or near death and suddenly they "were your best friend" I am not asking for sympathy...but I can't seem to ask for prayers either. I can't seem to have certain friends there for me. I am sorry to those I have been bugging and appreciate those who have been here since the beginning. The conversation I had last night with someone really hurt me and I just don't know what to think about certain people anymore. I said this on Twitter and I will say it again on here..but in a more G rated version. When I decide to push people out, I need to keep them out.


-- These things I wish for you - tough times and hard
work, disappointment and happiness. To me, it's the
only way to appreciate life.

md

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So the CT showed nothing abnormal with my gallbladder and appendix but they found air in my bladder and lymph nodes around my intestine which indicates something viral..no one knows how air got into my bladder. I have an ultrasound in the afternoon tomorrow as well as a follow up on Tuesday. What are my thoughts? I don't really know at this point. The pain has subsided some due to the medication I am on but the pressure is still there as well as the nausea at night.

I have a prep test in the afternoon tomorrow in History but I don't know if I can even concentrate enough to absorb the material on the power points that I have been missing. I am so out of it.

Thanks again for all the love. I am ready for this to be over. I have a feeling I won't ever feel "caught up" until the end of the semester.

xo md

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I am looking at my search engine referrers and I can see that there is somebody searching for info on Sandee and whoever it is, I want to tell you she IS still alive and fighting. She has been on oxygen for awhile now and is weak, but her sweet self is still here. Hope this helped someone out there who is worried.

Mollie

PS: Please comment if you are reading this and it was you. I would be happy to keep you updated. We also have a Facebook group that is dedicated to her that periodically has updates as well.

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I get to experience my first CT scan/ultrasound this Saturday morning.

It is day 10 and nothing is better. I have been suddenly waking up in the middle of the night with throbbing headaches, nausea and abdominal pain (other than the pain I already have during te day). This is really upsetting because my school grades are going to go down the sh***er (no other word to give it justice, really) and I can't go to work until I can actually function without crying and being in agony. I pray they find something on the scan so they can remove it and I can start feeling better. It's hard to drive because I have to keep re positing myself to keep pressure off the left side of my stomach.

I had some blood tests and after having issues finding my vein, they got what they needed. I tested negative for mono so that is ruled out.

It's hard not to cry when some things are out of your control.

I've got this, though. One day at a time.

Thanks to everyone who has been texting. I have been getting drowsy like it's no ones business and if I don't text back, I am probably asleep and will when I wake up.

md.

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MOLLIE DUVALL

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[twenty-one yrs young, blogging on and off since 2002, loves photography, God,friends, photoshop, strawberry poptarts, designer, life.]
I've been told I care too much. Probably so and sometimes I think it is a weakness..but I would rather live in love than die in hate- no matter how many times it gets thrown back at me. I forgive. Forgiveness comes natural, sometimes unfortunately- I am the "fix it" type of girl. I am not okay if a relationship isn't. But I am slowly realizing that some things are beyond my control- people's behavior, actions, and mindsets. I know I can't change that and need to let it be.







I have faith. Faith in our wondrous capacity for hope and good, love & trust, healing & forgiveness. Faith in the blessing of our infinite ability to wonder, pray, feel & think. I have faith. Faith in the infinite possibilities of the human spirit.- Starbucks Cup

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